okie, this is from my book – secrets she left behind.
‘stop, think, act’ is the advise from a mother to her son.

three basic words.

but are they really basic when you link them together?
how often does we do that – stop, think, act.

two things that control me (let tok abt me, since its my blog)
heart – how you feel, we’re talkin abt emotions.
head – when you remove all emotions and look at the big picture, talkin abt logical, common sense.

which one am i? it depends on situation.
i can be cold when i dish out advises to others, without considerin how others ppl felt.
i can be mean when it necessary.
i can even be lame in my response when i dont feel like answerin your qn. 🙂

but i cant say i cut myself out completely from feeling.
i’m loaded with empathy.
i am soft-hearted.
i can even be fairy godmother ! haha !

how /when does one draw the line?
of coz, man are better at drawin line den woman.
do i wanna be a man and be so practical abt things / issues that i lost my sense of empathy.

how terrible it will be when one ignore feelin and live life as it is, just to avoid being hurt / disappointment.
shldnt one take chances in life, afterall you only live once?

do you need a conclusion? sure, im good at it !

*drum roll

conclusion:
i found myself leaning towards  ‘stop, think, act’ instead of following my feelings blindly. perhaps it a sign of maturity, a sign of being responsible for my own action. i have no idea.

let me sum it up – stop, think and act with your heart in it.
safe bet.

G.

i’m gotta break this into several parts:

Part 1: crybaby
kor called me that smts.

i cry when i’m in pain, i cry when i’m upset, i cry when i’m frustrated. haha !

Part 2: refuse to cry
i can tell u too when i dont cry.

and this kind of refusal to cry is heartbreaking to others –
when i am sad, when i know that crying doesnt helps.

i dislike crying, when i know it gotta make me look weak or to gain sympathy. oh pls, i take gamemanship anyday, just dont give me the ‘dear-are-you-okie-look’ it tiring for me to assured you i am fine.

Part 3: cry when you’re touched.
you know recently i read this ‘ tentative contact. believed not in divine salvation but in the proposition tat we poor mortals are fully capable of savin ourselves, if conditions and inclinations are right, and the evidence of this potential is found in the smallest of gestures’

i agreed. sometimes it d smallest of gestures that touched me. just like the simple coffee + biscuit my dad made for me at 6.30am.

part 4: summary
tears are a form of expressing your emotion. just like laughter.
but there’s where the similarities end.
tears go deeper, something that you cried abt, sad or happiness – i think are things that you remember for a long time. whatever it is, the person or occasion matters to generate tears, probably the reason why i dislike when others cry for me.

do i remember my last tears?
no.
coz i dont believe in keeping negative memories.
take what’s good with you, look back in laughter and not in pain.

part 4(A): revised summary
laughter is equally impt. stupid things that you did, silly mistakes, dumbo error, whether it laughin at a joke, at yourself, it pulls you closer to the other party.

do i remember my last laugh?
yes.
just. over a bag of cheezels with jie / kor
teasing each other, stupid jokes, laughed abt life.

G.

jen – lets do something crazy before your school starts.

i’m game.

but we could not think of anythink. oh, please dont mistaken us. there were items in our crazy-list. but we arent doing any of those.

the crazy think i did was hop over to jen’s place without any extra clothes.
the crazy think i did was waited for her like 3 hrs while she out with her frds. make myself comfortable on her sofa and read my book.
the next crazy thing we did was slp at 4am woke up at 1pm. she woke up at 3pm. haha !
the last crazy thing we did was decided to go tioman in jan. i need to go a beach resort every jan, being it my bdae mth and a reward for myself for the hard work. i like startin the year with a beach-y resort, just doing nothing. thats my idea of life.

ahh.
yes, i loved doing silly things, make life interesting.

G.

situation
realised a restaurant short-charge you for some food.
what will you do?

ans
i will point it out to the staff and asked to be charge. this goes without thinking. dumb, yes. thank you.

reason:
its the right thing to do.

percentage of it happening
0%.
coz i dont check my bill. i have no idea if i’m being overcharge or smt. hehe

G.

what are you gotta do if i choke on the fish bone? other den askin me ‘r u okie?’

‘pray for u?’
haha !

i go on to state that he gotta finish the meal, ask for complimentary dinner (coz it the restaurant’s fault) ask for free vouchers and bring me to doc.

yes, my new nix is miss lamey.

G.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=pfsgXe24cqk&feature=response_watch

hv i share this with you guys?
i have a thing with acoustic, just like i have a thing with guys wearin white shirt. 🙂
point aside.
this version always earned a smile from me, anytime, anyday.
njoy.

– G

dont you just hate it when someone perceived you as the poor little kitten or something?

god ! i totally dislike it !
yes, there are times i need pple to coodle me but there’s still a limit.
the way to deal with me is – simply listen .. hear me out, that all i wanted. no, tat what everybody wanted ! pls, when i say that i’m fine. its a full stop, not a comma for further questioning.

thanks for your concern and all but please dont look at me as if the word ‘fragile’ is stamp on my forehead. yes, i looked soft and weak but trust me, i am stronger den the average joe.
actually, most of us are – when you’re left with no choice.

ms chan shared with me.. her sister used to be afraid of cockroaches and friends, but now tat she’s a mother of two, she gotta be the brave one to protect her little ones.

unlike ms chan’s sister, i dont need to be brave for anyone. yeap, okie, brave for myself.
so, what make you think tat i will break into pieces.
in fact, it this helpless feeling that gave me the strength to be strong.
– found this in my draft !
*woah i’m no longer upset la but decide to go ahead and publish this.
interesting read.
– G

question posed over lunch by ms chan:
if you can choose any career, what will be your choice?
(note: anything and everything goes)

are you ready for my ans?!
pilot. not just a plain commercial plane pilot but a fighter pilot.
either i shoot pple or pple shoot me kind. haha !
challenging?
dream big pple.

– G

you need both trust and distrust for any form of relationship
– hear this sentence recently.

trust
– i’m not one who suspect anyone who come my way, i trust everyone to be nice. i’m nice to you and you will be nice to me sorta thinking.
– this world is so filled with doom and gloom, which i dont like.
– by nature, i’m a trusty and warm person.
naive? maybe.
but i rather be on this side of the fence den going on thinkin that everyone is a mean & selfish person. i think that’s a tiring way of living. i choose to believe in the goodness of pple.

distrust
according to kor – his theory is believing that everyone cannot make it. he have zero expectation of pple around him. super prejudice yet his argument being – it easy for pple to impress him, since he starts with zero, just a little action on your part and he will be super impressed.

i’m not that extreme. i do have basic expectation of pple.
but whenever pple did what is expect of them. i’ll make a mental note ‘hey, this person is trustable/reliable’

90 / 10 – ??

i’m still someone who will give you 100% trust. you dont have to cross the grand canyon to gain my trust.  but like everyone else, dont break the trust – it wont be easy to get it back.

woah. whats with this entry?
sucha simple sentence and i could write paragraph of tots outta it.
groove the philosopher. groove master of bullshit.

G.

red? hehe !
but i love the colour.
‘groove’ as the background;
‘groove’ as the profile;
welcome msg ‘groovy’

miss groove
🙂