( rare entry )
perhaps someone could provide some answer (guy !)
– yes he did. it nice throwing qns at him & getting answer.
answers i been seekin for.

perhaps, writing simply make me feel better.

basic background.
man A attached with woman A.
man A cheat on woman A, with woman B.
woman A dump man A.
man A + woman B = an item.

my tots:
let me state this – its none of my biz.

i’m just puzzled & amazed by humans.
smts, i felt.. i could learn so much stuff but there’s simply no good reasons for the things we (humans) do..and it make me wondered ‘why play nice’ shit happens to nice pple.

life.. humans are complex.

questions:
how others look at her? how could woman B live with herself?
its beyond my understanding.

most impt, how could woman B feel secure with man A. havent woman B heard? things always come a full circle. i feel sorry for woman B. the starting of the r/s is aldy so wrong, how could you right things out.

guy’s input.
raise my qns to guy. he listened and gave me a damn good answer – desire.

woman B desire to be with man A goes beyond all moral issue. the desire are greater den how others look at her, how she look at herself.

guy – let me write out a summary & my tots okie?

summary / conclusion /tots.
guy mentioned abt integrity too. you can be emotional-weak (like me !) you can be tempted (like some man) but your integrity is what separate man from cockroaches or woman from witches.

he is right. its a matter of acceptance for me.
learn to accept there are pple like woman b & yeap, let go of the issue. i will be happy. i told guy, i will.. just a matter of time.

base on my own vaules / beliefs, i’ve condemned her action. yes, she might have her reasons, her background, her influences but some things to me.. its simply black & white. there’s no grey area to speak of. its wrong, its wrong. i believe in second chances (i can hear guy goes ‘yar yar’ ) but not when the right / wrong is crystal clear. second chance theory went out of the window.

i accepted guy reason – desire.
but its beyond my understanding.

perhaps guy is right, when i find myself in the same situation, i might do likewise. trash all integrity / moral and simply follow my heart. yet, i know, i cant. i wont. like guy said, that will be the first step. if you can stamp your own approval, what’s next? the de-value oneself process will continue and you will stoop at nothing for that moment of desire.

next.
he comment – im only lookin for faithfulness / trust / security in a man. what abt other stuff? like responsible? caring? the list goes on..

guy, the rest of the stuff are impt to me but those always come first.

last.
guy told me smt which i agreed – smts he wondered why think so much? do like everyone else, hv fun & njoy life. but that will snowball problems to later part of life.

*pause.

of coz, by the time you read this. this topic no longer bothers me.
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alritey, let’s have a break.
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whatsup?!

why do i feel like a mini-version of guy?! the need to learn & understand..  so that i wont commit the same mistakes.

granted. i’m not as righteous as he is. i’m not as stubborn as he is (haha !) but i do like his way of life.

‘i’m very human. thats all i am. all i want to be. a good human’

i know, some might find us kinda bo-liao !
no, i dont see it that way. for, answers made me feel better.

no meaning entry. just unloading tots online.

– happy G.