Woke up this morning with tears in my eyes..
Follow up yesterday. It worries me to see what’s under the dressing. I want to remove the dressing but I also got used to it. it also my first time out of the house in 1 week, everything seems different outside, brighter, noisier, endless space.
We waited for Dr Ang for about 1 hour, she’s in an emergency c-section. She asked how I am and shared with me the report of my surgery. Its confirmed the 2 cysts are endometriosis and I have a p-something. (I forgot the name and cant find my medical report..) the report also show something about my womb. If I am an older woman, the doc would suggest removing the entire womb as it would lead to cancer.
Dr Ang wants me to go through with the entire treatment for endometriosis. Brochure: Decapeptyl CR is effective in inhibiting endometrial tissue growth. This eventually results in the decrease in size of endometrial tissues.
She removed my dressing and the stitches. She made kervin stand beside me and hold my hands. The injection to tummy was painful. Dr Ang describes the injection as a burning sensation.
We will try for baby next year. I asked Dr Ang what about removing my womb and she say we will cross the bridge when it happens, usually happens at 40. Meanwhile, let’s try to start a family.
The injection is $500 each, total of 3 injections.
Money is not an issue, my insurance cover it. My surgery cost is covered by insurance as well.
We made a pact to tea break at Delifrance. The tears just came. Why is it so freaking easy for others but not me? Whoever up there felt that I am not ready to be a mum..more time to do whatever I want, clear my always wanted list. But why do I have to go through so much more than the average mum? why didn’t we try for baby once we got married? I don’t regret the past 3 years with kervin. Fights aside, he’s been a fantastic husband.
I asked him yesterday.. would he leave me? I am going to bring a lot of problems and heartache. He promises to stand by me. I asked him too, is it fair to have a child? What if something happen to me? What is he and the child gotta do? What will happen to my vin vin?
The pain from the needle is nothing compare to the heartache.
life is what you make of it. I am going to be upset for a couple of days, but I don’t believe in sulking for too long. I just been through a surgery, I should cheer up and stay positive.
– G